We open with a view of a hot tub, as bold letters inform us per usual that this is “A RANDALL SCHWARTZ PRODUCTION” before the man himself steps into the view wearing his finest tuxedo. He is holding the hand of a lovely young lady wearing her finest nightgown, a smile on both their faces as the Entertainer begins to speak.
“Folks, I want to talk to you about romance. There’s nothing more thrilling than meeting the love of your life, someone you can hold close and spend your life with. Someone you can call your own…and can hold a claim to you, in return.”
He gives a wink to his companion, drawing her closer to the hot tub before continuing.
“Love is a crazy thing, and so too is professional wrestling. In both cases, you will face incredible highs and terrible lows, and every curveball imaginable could come your way. Whether you’re a lover or a wrestler, you have to prepare for anything, and I do mean anything.”
Another wink to the lovely woman standing beside him, who steps into the hot tub as we focus on Randall’s face before he continues.
“Unlike some folks, there is nothing undercover about my love, whether it’s for romance or for the business of professional wrestling. I know a man who is looking for his comeback after some tough losses…but unfortunately for you, Lover, I don’t take that sort of thing lying down.”
The cheery look on his face slowly fades away, replaced with a look of intensity as Randall continues.
“I am hard and firm in my confidence, Undercover Lover, and when we head back to the Studio I will show you just how explosive I can be in that ring!”
We hear a knowing chuckle from the lady offscreen, but Randall pays no mind as he is now “in the zone” as he continues.
“I will show you everything I’ve got when we’re in that ring, and I will leave you screaming for mercy!”
The chuckling turns into laughter, which finally catches the attention of the Entertainer.
“What’s so funny!? I won’t let this Undercover Lover jerk me around, I’ll have you know! I will have my way with him, and when I’m done…”
Randall can’t even finish his thought as the woman is just cackling now. Randall is in such a rage now that he storms off, cutting this promo off prematurely as we fade to black.