Only a single cloud of smoke explodes on stage left. CARLO AMARETTO appears, looking flabbergasted.
Carlo: GOMEZ, you fool! You missed your cue!
A second plume of smoke rises up on the stage right. GOMEZ AMARETTO appears, looking vexed.
Gomez: CARLO, you idiot! You came in too early!
All of a sudden, the two magician brothers are snarling into each other’s faces.
Carlo: This is preposterous! First you ruin our chance at those precious Classique Wrestling Tag Team Championships, and now you’re ruining our grand entrance!
Gomez: WHAT?! It was YOU who cost us the match at SLAM-A-THON! Did you forget the routine? It’s the UMPIRE that picks the card… not the opponent!
Carlo: BAH! There wasn’t enough time to go over it! I thought I had until the stroke of midnight on the morrow to practice!
Gomez: You nincompoop! Twelve of the clock in the ante meridian IS the morrow! Are we not supposed to be masters of space AND time?
Their not-so-lovely assistant SUZI steps into the frame, cigarette forever dangling from her grimacing lips.
Suzi: Ey, are youse guys gonna be at this all day, or can I get my check and go? I gotta start my shift at Applebee’s soon, and I still need to run to the liquor store for some scratch-off cards…
Carlo and Gomez forget what they’re arguing about as they slowly turn their heads in unison to their assistant, looking absolutely incredulous.
Carlo: Are you DAFT, woman?!
Gomez: Get back to your post and await your cue!
Suzi rolls her eyes. Somehow, this job seems better than the one at Applebee’s.
Suzi: Yeah, yeah… whatevah.
As the assistant shuffles back offstage, Carlo and Gomez recommence their conversation, now without the hostility.
Carlo: We have got to get back on the same page of the spellbook here! What would they think of us back in Vegas if they could see us now?
Gomez: No doubt, they would not believe their own eyes… and not in the way we intended!
Carlo: Fortunately, we are men with many, many aces up our sleeves! So hope is not lost for us yet! You have the chance to redeem your embarrassing mistakes at Slam-A-Thon in a one-on-one match at EPISODE HEX!
Gomez: Indeed! And the shame and humiliation that you have brought on this team will disappear into thin air once I earn an absolutely dazzling victory over that Cowabunging Cow-face, BRADLEE ABRAMS!
Suzi: Bowie.
The twins scowl in unison in their assistant’s direction. Moving forward, Carlo hands Gomez a set of handcuffs.
Carlo: Show these puny non-believers how easily we manipulate the laws of this material world to our will! Show them the famed EGYPTIAN ESCAPE ENIGMA!
Gomez straps the handcuffs across his wrists, binding his hands together. Then his hands move with mystical motions…
Gomez: YES, brother… as with this mind-bending feat, my inevitable triumph over that surfing simpleton will be absolutely…!
…and they anticlimactically come to a rest to show that the handcuffs are still securely attached.
Gomez’s arms struggle frantically to free himself, but the cuffs don’t budge. The brothers exchange confused expressions, then know exactly how to fix the situation.
Carlo & Gomez: SUZI!!!
Gomez takes a few steps back as a groan can be heard off-camera, and a curtain drops to hide him from view. Still in the foreground, the glowering Carlo takes up the center of the shot and speaks directly to the camera.
Carlo: Classique Wrestling! We may be humbled from time to time, but if there’s anything we are NOT, it’s HOAXES and HUCKSTERS!
The obvious sound of a hacksaw grinding through a chain and Gomez cursing can be heard in the background.
Carlo: Revenge will be glorious and amazing as my brother, the Killer Kadabra GOMEZ AMARETTO, conjures up a new world of PAIN for BOWIE NELSON!
Suzi: Abrams.
Carlo glares off-stage to Suzi, but then a tool can be heard clanging to the floor in the background, so he gives her the cue to act and throws up his hands.
Carlo: AVANTI!
On cue, the curtain drops, and we see the puffy-faced Gomez’s arms being majestically thrown out to his sides to reveal his amazing escape. He has “freed” himself from his bindings by “magically” making the chain break at the halfway point.
Gomez: TA-DAA!!
Carlo: AMAZING!!
With their fire back, the brothers throw arms over their shoulders and laugh with pride and pomp as the scene fades to black.