The snow is falling.
Quickly, but serenely. The type of fluffy snow that makes for good winter antics. You know: frolicking gaily and the sort. But there’s no frolicking to be had here, because we’re smack dab in the darkest recess of a sprawling pine-filled forest without a soul in sight. In fact, it’s completely silent: the birds aren’t chirping and the wind isn’t howling – the bright whiteness of the falling snow only adding to the sense of calm.
We’re in a small clearing in the center of the woods where the trees part to reveal a jagged piece of solid ice sticking out of the ground. A small mountain of ice that large would be interesting enough by itself, but what’s even more remarkable is what rests inside that block of ice. Amazingly, frozen in place inside the giant ice cube is a man.
Not just any man.
“Feral” Freddy Kilgore.
He’s dressed in his wrestling attire, which for some reason makes his current frozen state even more worrisome. He’s locked into a very superhero-like pose – his arm is extended toward the heavens and his left leg is bent to give us the impression he is in mid-leap. His eyes, though lifeless and frozen, nevertheless flash with an undeniable defiance.
As the rate of snowfall picks up slightly, a single sound pierces the otherwise silent winter scene: the sound of footsteps crunching on freshly fallen snow.
A figure steps into the clearing. This mystery person is dressed for the weather with boots, gloves, and a hefty winter coat with a hood drawn up over their face to obscure their identity. The figure treks through the snow, stopping directly in front of the ice shard.
Our mystery figure reaches up with slender hands and slowly removes her hood, revealing her face.
It’s “Wild” Kat Diamond.
She places a single hand on the chunk of ice, looking into the frozen eyes of her companion. When she speaks, a puff of frozen air flies up into the air.
She leans forward and plants a single kiss on the ice shard. She steps back, and for several seconds there is no noticeable change.
And then if you look closely, you begin to see Kilgore’s pupils begin to move. Left, then right, and finally locking eyes on Wild Kat.
There is a low rumbling that seemingly bellows up from the Earth itself. The snow suddenly picks up in intensity as a fierce wind blows across the region, bending the tops of the green pines with ferocity.
As the rumbling intensifies, a small crack forms in the ice block.
Then another. Another.
Out of nowhere, the shrill voice of Vince Neil:
THE ICE SHARD SHATTERS! Millions of tiny reflective pieces fly into the air as Wild Kat pulls back her hood to shield her face. In the center of the clearing, standing among the frozen ruins, Freddy Kilgore rests on all fours, panting heavily.
Wild Kat walks over and places a hand on his shoulder. Slowly, he rises to his feet, blinking to reorient himself with the world. He locks eyes with his most trusted companion.
“Am I needed?”
“Alex Bruder. Lord Colossus.”
“Winter break is over, baby.”
Without warning, Freddy Kilgore, leans back and HOOOOOOWWWWLLLLS deep from inside his soul. It echoes off the falling snow as the peace and calm of winter is destroyed.
“Feral” Freddy Kilgore is back.