“Well, boys, I think it’s time I went easy on you.”

Cold open.

We’re in what appears to be a nondescript locker room in just about any commercial gym anywhere in the world. Leon Van Zandt and Mushigihra sit on a bench, looking sufficiently tired, but not their usual state of being on the brink of collapse.

Eddie Dante stands before his Foreign Legion, looking into his men’s eyes with a confident grin. After weeks of arduous torture and training methods that would make Bobby Knight blush, the dapper Dante seems way more relaxed, and at the moment, so do his clients.

Eddie Dante: This weekend Classic Wrestling makes its debut on Columbus, Ohio, and we’ll make sure to show those Buckeyes just how powerful the Foreign Legion can truly be.

Mushigihara: OSU?

Dante shakes his head.

Eddie Dante: No, no, Mushi. You spell it out. Like, O-S-U. Ohio State University. That’s their… you know, they don’t talk about university sports outside of America, so maybe it’s not a big deal. But what IS a big deal, is how we show that bushy Boy Scout Harry Chest who the REAL superpower is in that ring.

With a slight bow, the Belgian grappler Leon Van Zandt speaks up.

Leon Van Zandt: Meneer Dante, I know that Harry Chest might not be a match on his own, but does he not have a partner for this match we do not know of?

A beat. Dante puts a finger to his chin and nods.

Eddie Dante: This is true, Leon. There is a lot we don’t know about Chest’s partner, but if they’re anything like him as a wrestler, then they are simply no match. I suspect it won’t take much effort for us to dispatch that buffoon and whoever is dumb enough to play the role of his “sidekick,” so really it’s just a matter of us looking as dominant as possible.

The hulking God-Beast chuckles as he grins from ear to ear.

Mushigihara: Hahaha… Ooooooosu.

Eddie Dante: Exactly, Mushi. Overpower him and dismantle him. And then, we can get back to work rising to the top of the Classic Wrestling tag team division.

He chuckles once more as Leon and Mushi tap fists.

Cut.