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Vito Valentino vs The Undercover Lover

August 3, 2022 by mikey

Robbins: Ladies and gentlemen the next matchup is scheduled for one fall, with a 20 minute time limit and is our MAIN EVENT OF THE EVENING! 

The fans get loud for realsies. 

Robbins: Introducing first… Hailing from “The City of Love” New Orleans, Louisiana. He weighs in at 225 pounds… this is “Mr Hide Your Daughters and Mothers” THE UNDERCOVER LOVER! 

Loud boos fill the Classic Wrestling studios, but the Undercover Lover treats them as compliments with a hand over his heart. 

Robbins: and his opponent…

The fans begin buzzing with just that. 

Robbins: Hailing from THE MECCA! Weighing in at 261 Pounds… This is “METRO” VITO VALENTINO! 

The fans get very loud and raucous. Vito shows his thanks with many friendly waves to the crowd. Lover mocks him from his own corner. 

The bell rings and this match is underway! 

When they come out of the corner both men circle each other slowly. Finally Vito makes the first move by raising one hand to the sky for a test of strength. He cautiously puts it out there towards the Lover. UC considers it for a moment, and steps forward with his own hand raised to meet Vito’s. Just before they 

touch and lock up, Lover pulls back, puts his hands behind his head and swivels his hips in the direction of Vito Valentino!

Howley: The Ultimate disrespect! 

Vito chuckles and then throws a punch that lands in the side of the head of the Lover. He falls but gets right back up. Vito hits him again. The crowd loses it as Vito speeds up his attack and now chases the Lover across the ring. Undercover slides under the bottom rope and to the outside to get away. He yells at the referee to gain control of this madman!

Undercover Lover: Listen, I know he’s the former champ, but move him back dammit, I’ve got a cramp! 

Lover slaps his leg, trying to get it back to tip top shape. Slowly he moves back in, but only when the referee pushes Vito back into a corner. 

Moss: Lover a little more cautious after that last encounter! 

Howley: Wouldn’t you be!? 

Another lock up attempt, and this time Vito transitions it into a side headlock. After wrenching away for awhile, Vito moves into the corner and attempts to pull off a bulldog but the Lover tosses him onto his back instead, breaking the hold. 

Moss: Very good reversal by the Lover there showing he’s more than just a freak in the sheets!

Howley: What did you just say?

Moss: Back to the match at hand partner, the champion is in trouble as the Lover stalks him as he tries to move to his feet! 

When Vito stands up, Undercover Lover comes from behind him and tucks his own head under the arm of Vito. 

Moss: Big back drop from the Lover lands Vito smack in the middle of the ring. 

Undercover Lover attempts a very nonchalant cover of the former REAL Worlds Champion. 

ONE!

TWO!

KICKOUT by Vito 

After bickering once again with the official the Lover gets back to work. He lifts Valentino back to his feet and grabs him by the baldness. Beginning with a run he heads toward the turnbuckle with rude intentions. 

Moss: Valentino blocks the attempt with his boot!…now he’s got the Lover by the hair! Vito slams Lovers head…Once! Twice! Three times! 

The Undercover Lover bounces back to the middle of the ring very dramatically. Metro wastes no time and hops on top of Vito and slams his fist into the mask several times. Lover is reeling. Vito jerks him to his feet and and picks him up and slams him down. The fans are rocking. Vito grabs both of the legs of the Undercover Lover.

Moss: He’s looking for the Metro Avenue Deathlock! 

Lover pulls Vito in and launches him back off using his legs as a springboard.

Howley: Not so fast! The Lover isn’t finished just yet! 

Both men get back up and go for a clothesline and both men connect! They land next to one another. The fans get loud as both men look up at the lights, sweating and breathing heavy.

The official begins his count and at the count of 8 both men are up once again!

When they meet the Lover goes for a headbutt but Vito dodges it! Instead Vito reaches down and sweeps the legs with both arms. Without hesitation Vito wraps the legs and flips him over. Lover screams in pain and reaches for the ropes. 

Moss: HES GOT THE METRO AVENUE DEATHLOCK LOCKED IN!

Before long the Lover has no choice but to submit to the referee. 

The bell rings and the Eagles song begins. 

“Life In the Fastlane ” plays while Vito’s hand is raised. The referee makes sure to keep between he and the Lover. Undercover holds his back while climbing to his feet. He’s very upset as he rolls under the bottom rope. From the back comes a very top heavy lady.

Moss: Who is that!? 

Howley: I SAW HER FIRST! 

She saunters over to the Lover and whispers something into his ear. With this he perks right up and follows her right through the curtain. He holds his back as he walks and lets out a “HAVE MERCY!” as he disappears. 

Robbins: Ladies and Gentlemen here is your winner by submission, VITO VALENTINO!

Vito shakes his head, not knowing how to take the situation. Instead he hops out of the ring and heads over to the Classic fans and begins high fiving and signing autographs. 

Moss: Well folks that’s going to wrap it up for us here at Classic Wrestling on RBTV tonight, catch us back here in two weeks for another action packed episode! 

Howley: I still want to know who that was! 

Moss: For my partner, Joel “Thunderbird” Howley, my name is Patrick Moss, and its been a pleasure broadcasting to you. Goodnight folks! 

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