The search for the mysteries of In Your Haunted House have taken us back to the doldrums of the Gund Arena… now out in the parking lot of the arena. Once more, we find ourselves with Dr. Selah Graves, using her magnifying glass to look out into the night sky while a rather ham radio setup in one of the parking lot stalls near an extension cord. Standing next to her is Jurassic Joe Stone, fixating on the night sky above him.
Dr. Graves: Hello, once again, Classic Wrestling fans. I am still Dr. Selah Graves, World-renowned archaeologist and budding ham radio operator. And Joe and I are going to try and reach out to the stars with this ham radio here. If we can make first contact, perhaps if alien involvement is happening here..
She puts on the headset.
Dr. Graves: …we can finger out alien involvement here.
THEORY #2:
FIRST CONTACT WITH ALIENS MANIPULATING FROM AFAR
Dr. Graves: Hello! Hello! Can anyone out there hear me? My name is Dr. Selah Graves and I have a message if you can hear us out there?
Stone is confused by the entire setup and looks at her radio.
Joe Stone: What we doing?
Dr. Graves: As I stated before, first contact with aliens, Joe.
Stone looks up, then his fugly eyebrows go wide.
Joe Stone: Oh! Men from stars! Men from stars come down long time ago! They teach Joe to wrestle! Teach me everything I know! And about fire…
But as he blurts out this massive revelation… she’s too busy fiddling with dials and still has her headset on.
Dr. Graves: I’m sorry, Joe, I didn’t hear you. What was that?
But before The Wrestler That Time Forgot can say anything more, one of the arena security approaches.
Security Guard: Hey, you can’t be here! We need this space for trucks!
Dr. Graves takes her headset off and then turns to the man.
Dr. Graves: Oh, I’m so sorry, my good man. We’ve been here all night trying to figure out why In Your Haunted House is haunted in the first place. But since we do not have ghostbusters available to us, I’ve taken it upon ourselves to investigate.
Security Guard: It… it’s just the name of the show…
Dr. Graves: I… look here, mister…
She looks at the man’s name tag.
Dr. Graves: Allen. I’m…
Joe suddenly stands in between Dr. Graves and Allen.
Joe Stone: No! Doctor! You hear him! That alien! You no go near bum, alien! I not fall for that! I bash your brains in!
Allen: …What?
Joe angrily holds his club up and when Allen realizes how serious things get, he runs with the quickness.
Joe Stone: Get away!
Dr. Graves: No, Joe! Allen! Not Alien! No!
The Doctor chases after as the show heads elsewhere.