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Undercover Lover vs SGT Justice vs Lunchbox Larry

June 23, 2022 by mikey

Robbins: The following match is for the Number one Contendership to the Premier American Championship. 

♫ “Bad Boys” by Inner Circle ♫

Blue and red police-style light bars flash to life on either side of the entryway as Sgt. Justice calmly steps through the curtain, his silver, mirrored aviators glistening in contrast to his dark blue uniform that still sports LAPD shoulder flashes.  He sharply comes to attention facing an American flag hanging from the rafters and stiffly salutes it, the crowd responding with a cheer before Sgt. Justice walks with purpose to the ring, up the steps, and through the ropes, waving to the crowd before retreating to his corner and removing his hat and glasses, setting them neatly under the bottom turnbuckle and allowing the referee to check him over.

Robbins: Introducing first he is SARGENT JUSTICE!

“Beat It” begins to play over the PA system as Lunchbox Larry comes out from the back, to a cheering audience. He high fives a few fans in the front row along the stage and heads towards the ring. He climbs the stairs swiftly and gets into the ring. The ref walks over and begins to check him over.

Robbins: Introducing second he is LUNCHBOX LARRY!

“Hello It’s Me” plays as the lights begin to flicker pink and white. Undercover Lover pops out from the back and stands tall at the top of the ramp. Much to the chagrin of the crowd. A smile peeks out from his mask as he walks down the ramp, only paying attention to the ladies that are at ringside, and ignoring the other fans. As he gets to the ring he doesn’t pay any attention to his opponents and stays locked in on the ladies in the crowd, even as the Ref checks him for foreign objects. 

Robbins: And the final participant is… UNDERCOVER LOVER!!!!

Moss: This match will determine who will take on the Winner of King Kong Frank and Bobby Dean at a future date for the Premier American Title.

Howley: I can tell you right now that all three of these men are going to take this seriously .

Moss: We can sure hope so…

Larry, Sargent and Lover are all in the ring bouncing up and down waiting for the bell to ring. 

Howley: And there’s the bell.

As soon as it sounds Sargent and Larry bolt for one another. Trading wild blows in a flurry. Lover confusedly looks between the two men and simply shrugs and rolls under the bottom rope leaving both men fighting in the middle of the ring.

Moss: What is Lover doing?

Howley: Scouting the local talent I presume.

Moss: He’s in a match right now.

Howley: I’m sure he is aware of it, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.

Moss: What does that mean?

Howley: You see when a ring rat….

Moss: Please stop talking. 

Lover saunters around the outside of the ring, playing with a few fans at ringside. Every so often looking into the ring to make sure nothing out of the ordinary is happening. The Sarge takes control over Larry and whips him hard into the corner, as Larry bounces off and is met by a huge back body drop. Sarge begins to stomp away at Larry while shouting at Lover to get into the ring. Lover simply waves him away as a lady on the front row has caught his attention. 

Moss: Look Sarge is getting frustrated by his lack of involvement.

Howley: Or maybe he’s just jealous he’s talking to hot babes.

Moss: I highly doubt that.

Larry is able to block a few of the stomps and grabs ahold of Sarge’s boot and drags him down to the mat by the knee. Larry gets to his feet and stomps in the gut of Sarge. He also looks towards Lover and tries to get his attention. Lover glances over his shoulder and shakes his head. 

Howley: Look at the grace of Lover.

Moss: Thinking with the wrong head.

Howley: Now you’re getting it.

Moss: THERE’S LITERALLY A MATCH GOING ON!

Howley: No need to yell. 

Moss: *Despondent Sigh*

Larry continues to stomp on Sarge and pulls him to his feet. And locks in a deep side headlock. Sarge’s arm flails around reaching for anything. Then Sarge wraps his arms around the waist of Larry and lifts him up and slams him down with a side suplex. Sarge goes for a cover. 

ONE!

Moss: A great move by Sarge.

Howley: Larry kicks out at one. 

Moss: It’s going to take more than that.

Lover pauses for a moment and once he sees that the count was broken he went back to the lady in the front row, but now has taken up residence on the timekeeper’s table that is ringside. He is now sprawled out on top of it. Laying down propping his head up without a care in the world.

Howley: Why is that so close to the ring?

Moss: I don’t know.

Howley: Someone could get seriously injured.

Moss: Best not to think about it. 

Meanwhile in the ring Sarge has taken a mounted position and is raining down lefts and rights to Larry. 

Moss: Talk about a picture. Two men fighting each other, and one fighting his pants.

Howley: Just as god had intended!

Moss: You’re unbelievable.

Suddenly Sarge stops and looks over towards Lover. Then he smacks the face of Larry a few times and forces him to look as well. The two men speak quietly for a moment before both getting to their feet. A quick handshake as both men approach Lover, who is still laying on the table. The fans around him point behind him but he waves them off.

Moss: It looks like Sarge and Larry have come to a truce, as both men are fed up with Lover!

Howley: That’s cheating! It cannot be allowed!

Moss: Well it is happening and Lover is none the wiser!

Sarge reaches over the top rope and grabs Lover by the top of his mask and begins to pull him up. Lover is shocked and tries to keep his mask on but Larry joins into the fray grabbing Lover as well. Both men easily lift Lover onto the apron. Larry spins Lover around and holds him in place, as Sarge runs the ropes quickly and goes for a massive lariat.

Howley: Get out of there Lover! This is an abomination!

Moss: He gets what he deserves!

Lover is able to break free at the last second and ducks down, causing Sarge to level Larry to the mat. Sarge looks at the fallen Larry for a brief second, when he turns to Lover he is met by a thumb in the eye. Lover reaches over the top rope and pulls Sarge close and jumps up on the apron and brings Sarge’s neck down over the top rope. Lover sits on the apron, feet on top of the table and wipes his hands clean. 

Moss: Lover manages to escape that predicament.

Howley: Thinking with two heads will always be the right move.

Moss: Anyways…

Lover rolls under the ropes and into the ring. Both of his opponents are down on the mat. Lover picks up Larry and set him in the corner and drives a shoulder into his midsection. Lover checks on Sarge before lifting Larry to a seated position on the top turnbuckle. Lover climbs to the middle rope and throws a few punches at Larry. 

Moss: Lover is looking to take this one high risk.

Howley: High reward!

Lover grabs Larry by the waist, but forgot to check on Sarge. Who is now on his feet and grabs Lover from behind and pulls him off of Larry. Sarge attempts a belly to back suplex as Larry shakes the cobwebs out. Sarge doesn’t notice what happens to Lover. 

Moss: LOOK AT LOVER!

Howely: LOOK AT LARRY!

Lover lands on his feet and stumbles back into the opposite corner. Larry leaps from the middle rope.

Moss: KNUCKLE SANDWICH! FLUSH ON THE SARGE!

Larry lands the move and stays on his feet, but before he has any time to celebrate, Lover swoops in and locks Larry into a hammerlock. Lover blows him a quick kiss with his free hand….

Howley: THE HEART STOPPER!

Lover looks down at both men and drags Larry on top of Sarge in a very precarious position. 

Moss: This is a FAMILY SHOW!

Howley: They are going to learn it one way or another.

Lover stacked both men and pins them in the middle of the ring, much to the dismay of the raucous crowd booing him louder than ever. 

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

Robbins: The winner of this match, and number one contender for the PREMIER AMERICAN CHAMPIONSHIP…. UNDERCOVER LOVER!!!

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