The house lights flicker as “Let It Rock” by Bon Jovi plays throughout the venue. The slow build of the guitar riff primes the crowd for the appearance of their hero in tights.
Moss: Alright folks we’ve got an interesting matchup coming up next!
Howley: You can say that again MOSS! It’s a super hero vs a super dork! I’m not even sure which is which.
Moss: Would you cut that out! Fans, this match wasn’t even originally scheduled for this evening, but Randall Schwartz made a mess of things recently for Harry Chest in a match at a non televised Classic Wrestling event last thursday!
At the song’s apex, Harry Chest walks out on stage sporting his flashy smile and signature heroically caped attire.
Howley: Say it how it is, He cost Chest his match. He came out and tried to impress a young lady at ringside, he pulled the leg of Chest as he came off the ropes, and distracted him.
Moss: Yea but after the match Chest got a little retribution!
He marches to the ring and misses most hand slaps with the fans. His hair is gelled back and his chest is pushed out with pride.
Howley: A cheap shot if you ask me!
Moss: That’s how we got to tonight.
A tuft of iconic chest hair protrudes from the top of his combat suit collar. The word ‘CHEST’ runs across his pectorals in fuzzy felt lettering.
Harry Chest ascends into the ring where his demeanor changes to a serious one.
“March and Fanfare” plays, sending the crowd into a big chorus of jeers as Randall Schwartz makes his way to the ring, flanked by a pair of local security as he taunts the crowd, threatening to sue anyone who touches him before he approaches the ring.
Moss: And here comes a man who you never know what he’s going to do!
Randall gets in the ring and puffs both his tongue and chest out and mockingly walks around the ring. He then points and laughs at Harry Chest as the referee backs him into his corner to check him for any weapons.
Robbins: This match, One fall, Fifteen minute time limit! In this corner weighing 176 Lbs. From Hollywood, California, RANDALL SCHWARTZ!
The crowd boos out as he raises his arms. Quickly he shoots a look at the fans and leans over the ropes at them.
Robbins: His opponent, Weighing 245 Lbs. From Swan River, Manitoba, HARRY CHEST!
Now the fans stand up and cheer loudly! This once again makes Randall upset!
As the ring announcer leaves the ring, referee Kevin Clady calls for the bell.
Randall leans in towards the bigger Chest and points to his own chin.
Moss: Schwartz already trying to get under the skin of Harry Chest.
Harry pulls his arm back as if he’s going to swing and Schwartz almost falls over trying to move out of the way. The fans laugh as Chest puts his arm back down. The two finally lock up in the middle of the ring and Chest moves right into a side headlock using his strength. As he wrenches, Schwartz is able to fall backwards and roll up Harry right away, only for a one count as Harry rolls over but keeps the hold on.
Schwarts is able to stand up and then finally throws a couple of shots at the ribs of Chest and finally he loosens the hold. Sensing his opportunity, Randall pushes off and Harry runs off of the ropes. A big dropkick from Randall is enough to knock down Harry Chest. Randall gets up and flexes towards the crowd.
Moss: He’s wasting time showing off like that!
Howley: He’s wasting time flexing like that! Look at those arms, I think my niece has more muscle!
Moss: Schwartz now working, dropping a big elbow on the back of Harry Chest! Pretty high elevation there.
Randall gets back up quickly, waits for Harry to get to his knees before he runs back in and kicks Harry in the ribs. He’s able to hold Chest to the ground for a few moments with a series of attacks.
Howley: If Harry Chest can’t get to his feet he’s going to have a hard time using his weight and size advantage! This is good strategy!
Randall gets up and goes for a jumping knee to the back of Chest but he’s able to roll out of the way. The crowd seems to react to the sign of hope. Randall gets back up and runs off the ropes this time and goes for a jumping elbow drop. Rolling out of the way just in time Harry is able to recover as Randall is preoccupied with his now hurting elbow.
Both men get back up and Randall in a panic goes for a big clothesline but Chest ducks underneath. When the Hollywood resident spins back around he catches a kick to the gut and Chest follows it with a quick vertical suplex. The crowd really comes alive for Harry’s burst of offense!
Harry picks up Randall and sends him off the ropes, Ducking his head he’s able to launch Schwartz high into the air and back down to the mat.
Howley: Which ones supposed to fly Moss!?
Moss: Not that one!
Harry Chest goes for the cover and hooks the leg. With each count he bounces his head.
Kickout by Schwartz!
Harry gets up and moves to a corner. He waits for Randall to make his way up as well and takes off running!
Howley: Here he comes MOSS!
Schwartz is able to spin out of the way as Harry goes for a running neckbreaker. The superhero lands flat on his back.
Schwartz grabs the leg of Chest and locks him in a side leg lock. Kevin Clady moves in to ask Chest if he’s ready to quit. As he does, Randall exploits an opportunity by reaching for the bottom rope and pulling on it, increasing the pressure on the hold. Harry Chest writhes in more pain but when Clady looks over to Schwartz, he’s let go of the rope.
Howley: Referee didn’t see it, I didn’t do it!
Moss: Classic cheater mentality!
Howley: CHEATER!? When you’re in there fighting for your life and your health Moss, you gotta do what you gotta do to get the job done! It’s the old adage, work smarter not harder.
Randall gets away with doing the same thing a second time, but on the third attempt the official sees him pulling the rope and admonishes him. After he begins a five count, Randall lets go, releasing the hold.
He pulls Harry to his feet, albeit slowly on wobbly legs. Randall lines up his shot and sticks a right jab right in the face of Harry . It knocks him back and Schwartz moves in for a second shot. It lands flush. Now Randall, full of confidence, does a little dance before he goes for the big third punch. He reels back, spins his arms a few times…
Howley: Here’s the windup!
He swings for the fences but catches nothing but air as Chest ducks under the blow. THe momentum carries him a full 360 degrees. When he comes back Harry Chest is able to place his head under the jaw of Schwartz before jumping high into the air.
Moss: THE CHIN DIMPLER! He hit it!
Howley: Call it what you will, the jawbreaker will knock you silly Moss!
Randalls Jaw meets the top of the head of Chest as he lands on the mat. Scwartz goes flying. After standing up and posing with both hands on his hips. He rolls Schwartz up with both legs.
ARM ON THE ROPES!
Moss: This one is not over! Schwartz had the wherewithal to recognize where he was and get that rope break.
Howley: Don’t look now but our Superhero is a little flustered!
Harry kicks at the air in frustration. He goes to pull up Randall Schwartz but The Hollywood resident is able to cradle the head of Chest. He rolls him into a pin. Kevin Clady slides down to see Chest’s shoulders!
Moss: Kevin watch out! Schwartz has his feet on those turnbuckles!
Too little, too late. The bell is called for.
Robbins: Ladies and Gentlemen, your winner is RANDALL SCHWARTZ!
Randall gets up in the ring and slides out quickly! He’s got his arms raised and smiles like he just got one over on the Superhero. He points to his head as Harry looks after him in shock.
Moss: What a matchup there, but in the end Schwartz takes the easy way out.
Howley: Smart man Moss! Never thought I would say that about Schwartz!
Moss: It’s a big rebound win for Schwartz whos had some issues since being eliminated from the REAL World’s Championship tournament! Now he looks to get back on track after a big win here!
Howley: Harry Chest has some work to do Moss! That Chin Dimpler should have been all she wrote but no dice! You have to be aware of where you are in that ring at all times!
Moss: Tough loss here for Harry Chest, but speaking of the REAL Worlds Championship, our new champion is coming up next! We’ll be right back folks!