We come back to ringside for our next match, with Moss and Howley standing by on commentary!
Moss: Well folks, it’s been a crazy night already but things are about to get even crazier with our next contest! After weeks of calling each other out, Bobby Dean and Undercover Lover go at it with a loaded sock on a pole…but Thunderbird, what in the world could be IN that sock?
Howley: Violence, Moss, simple as that.
With that we head to the ring itself, making note of the loaded sock attached to a pole in the corner as Harold Robbins is ready for match introductions.
Robbins: Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is scheduled for one fall with a loaded sock on a pole! Introducing first…
“You’re The Best” hits the sound system, signaling the arrival of Bobby Dean preceded by his tag partner Lunchbox Larry. The crowd cheers for their favorite as Bobby makes his way toward the ring…with Lunchbox Larry following close behind, of course.
Robbins: Making his way to the ring from the Third Stall on the Right by way of the Nearest Men’s Room…weighing in at a whopping 369…and a half pounds…he is BEAUTIFUL…BOBBY…DEEEEEEAAAANNNNNN!
Bobby and Larry approach the ring at last, with Bobby entering as Larry stays nearby. Bobby readies himself for this match,
Robbins: And his opponent…
“Hello It’s Me” plays over the sound system, garnering some immediate boos from the crowd as Undercover Lover makes his way toward the ring, relishing in the reaction with a smirk on his face. He stares Bobby Dean down as he approaches the ring, Larry looking very hesitant to get involved as the Lover enters the ring…only to get blindsided by Bobby Dean! Bobby has no interest in wasting time tonight as the ref calls for the bell to start this match!
Bobby stays on the attack with some clubbing elbows to the back of the Lover, before sending him to the corner opposite where the sock pole stands. Bobby immediately turns his attention to the pole, looking to gain possession of it ASAP…but the Lover doesn’t let him off easily, catching him with a forearm to the back of the head…and another one…and another one! The crowd is booing heavily as Lover continues to wear Bobby Dean down!
Moss: Lover really looking to have his way with Bobby Dean tonight!
Howley: It’s all about that pride, that passion Moss! Lovin’ isn’t easy!
Lover stays on top of things as he repeatedly hits Dean with an elbow, before the Beautiful one can turn things around sending the Lover facefirst into the turnbuckle! With the masked sensation down, Bobby tries to climb OVER him to reach for the sock…but gets dropped to his back by the Lover with a loud THUD!
Moss: The arena here in Columbus was just about shaken up from that one, Howley! Looks like trouble ahead for Bobby!
Howley: There goes the Lover now, he could very well get that sock!
Lover is up on the second rope, trying to detach the sock from the pole…but Bobby is back to his feet, huffing and puffing as he cuts the distance between him and the Lover with haste, before hoisting him up off the turnbuckle…and slamming him to the canvas!
Moss: WOW! Was that…was that a suplex by Bobby Dean!?
Howley: Big-time matches like this can bring the best out of anyone, Moss!
With Lover down and out after that impact, Bobby is able to climb one step up and just barely grab the sock! It’s in his possession now, and he has the right to use it as he sees fit…just as Lover slowly gets back to his feet! With some angry eyes the Beautiful one takes a swing at the Lover with the loaded sock…connecting with a loud THWACK to the amazement of the crowd! Feeling a bit out of it from the expended energy, Bobby drops down on top of the Lover for the count!
Lover tries to squirm his way out, but the sheer size of Bobby Dean was too much as the ref calls for the bell!
DING! DING! DING!
Robbins: Ladies and gentlemen, here is your winner…BEAUTIFUL! BOBBY! DEEEEAAAAAANNNNNN!
Larry slides into the ring to assist the ref in helping Bobby to his feet, before they raise his arms in victory to the crowd’s joy as we cut to commentary.
Moss: These two went at it hard tonight folks, but it was Bobby Dean coming out on top by getting that loaded sock down from the pole and picking up a HUGE win over the Undercover Lover in the process!
Howley: I swear we’re gonna end up on some sort of list for these jokes, Moss.
Moss: Folks, in just a moment we’ll be back for more action with the World Tag Team Championship on the line between Surf Express Bro and the champions, the Amazing Amarettos!