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Jack Fargo and the Boys & Girls Club Want a Rematch

June 13, 2021 by mikey

Moss: Jack Fargo is standing by with our own Otto Price, and a few fans from the special Olympics and the local boys and girls club!  

Howley:  Whoa mama!!  A tough break for the olympian last week but he seems in good spirits here tonight.  We talked a bit backstage before the show and he’s definitely ready to get his feet wet in this new world of Classic Wrestling.

On the side stage just off the entrance ramp with a massive “Classic Wrestling on RB-TV” banner hangs proudly as a backdrop A bleacher of fans next to the staging cheers on the great Otto Price as the camera lights go hot.  Otto stands tall holding a microphone in the face of Jack Fargo who has about 8 special needs, and little urban achievers filling the space behind Fargo.  Fargo is already sweating in an armpit stained baby blue polo shirt and salmon colored cargo pants.  

Price: Last week we saw you make your professional wrestling debut in a somewhat questionable loss to Alex Bruder.  How’s that sitting with you now that you’ve had some time to marinate on it?

Fargo: ummmm well soooooo uh thank you for having me out here tonight.  I ummm I think ahhh well it wasn’t good….you know.

Fargo laughs nervously as one of the kids starts making faces into the camera. 

Price: I see you brought some company out here with you tonight? 

Fargo: HA HA HA YES!  In partnership with Wheaties and Classic Wrestling on RBTV we are working closely here in the ahhhh ummmm the community, you know.  To ahhh help give our special needs athletes better equipment as well as the local boys and girls club!   We are donating $5000 dollars to each group!   You know?  

Price: Five grand to both the Boys and Girls club, and the special olympics?  Outstanding!!  Now everybody wants to know moving forward in Classic Wrestling do you have any goals? 

Fargo: Tony….I was talking to Tony 

Price: Excuse me? 

Fargo: oh ummm he’s ahhh this kid over here.  

A young fellow waves to the camera with a toothless smile. 

Fargo: Tony has had many obstacles in his life.  We all do.  These great fans. 

Jack Fargo claps towards the audience as the crowd goes mild. 

Fargo: My father when he got into the pet insurance space.  Astronauts when they go out into umm you know space.  Plumbers when they come ummm upon ahh ummm a messy situation…you know.  Presidents when they need to face challenges with health care and ummm other things….you know.  Me taking Bronze in the Olympics instead of gold.  Teachers when they don’t have funds needed to you know teach.  

Price: Ok? So what you’re saying is we all have obstacles. 

Fargo: Exactly, and last week for me was no different.  I want to be an example for ummm you know kids like Tony over here that sometimes life ain’t fair, the world is mean.  So the referee Chip made a mistake.  I talked to Chip and he apologized.  I’m sure Alex Bruder is not happy with the results either, after making an error illegally using my tights to ummm you know secure leverage.  I’m not going to cry over spilled lemonade because when life gives you a cow you can make ummm chocolate milk.  So I’m issuing a challenge to Alex Bruder for a rematch based on fair principles once his business in the big tournament concludes.   Because that’s what stand up men do.  Just like this umm you know this  kid Tony.  We stand tall and face our obstacles.  Now who’s ready for some popsicles and ice cream?!

The kids cheer loudly which is the best response of the whole segment. 

Price: There you have it!  Looks like Jack Fargo is asking for a rematch with “All Business” Alex Bruder!  We’ll see how this plays out, and if justice will be had.  Back to my esteemed colleagues.  

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