Well this is a sight.
We’re backstage, surprised the walls aren’t shaking, as we watch ‘Beautiful’ Bobby Dean charging down the hall. That’s right; charging. As in, a form of running. It’s at least as close to running as Bobby can get. On the other end of the hall we see a petrified Classic staffer, likely an intern from his perceived age, holding a large box that appears to be a donut flat.
Staff Intern: Oh god, not again! Bob sir, please remember these are for all the talen-
BBD: OUT OF MY WAY, YOU MONSTER!
Just as Dean reaches, mid stride, to push the scared youngster to the side, he stops. The intern sighs, rolling his eyes, and lifts the cover revealing a smorgasbord of delicious donuts. Bob grabs a Boston creme and bites off a piece like it owed him money.
BBD: Man, that’s the stuff. Gotta love donuts. Always there for me… WAIT! Dang you, evil temptress, I have a mission!
He spikes the rest of the donut like he just scored a touchdown and gets back to his version of running. That is, until he reaches a door labeled ‘Foreign Legion’. Dean straights himself off, brushes the crumbs caught on the top of his large belly, and with a mighty yell he steps forward and gives off a massive This Is Sparta kick.
The door bursts open, collides with the wall and rebounds back just as quickly, slamming right in Bobby’s face. The big man takes a moment to look around, as if wondering to himself “did anyone see that?” Scowling, Bobby carefully steps back up to the door and offers up a surprisingly soft knock.
Without waiting for a response he turns the knob and slowly opens the door, and sheepishly steps into the lion’s den.
Almost as surprised to see Bobby as we were to see him running, Leon Van Zandt and Mushigihara quickly jump to their feet, prepared for a scrap. The two men take a step forward, but jerk to a stop as Dean points at the two men in front of him menacingly. Breathing heavily, the interloper opens his mouth to speak, but no words come out. His pointed finger quickly turns up, requesting a second to allow him to catch his breath. I don’t know if you’re aware but Sparta kicking doors takes a lot out of you! He quickly folds over, with both hands on his knees trying to keep his large frame up as he continues to catch his breath. Leon and Mushigihara both turn to their manager and shrug simultaneously. Eddie Dante arises from his seat and casually pushes past his two clients as he steps forward to confront Bobby.
Dante: Where are those precious belts of yours, “champ”?
Finally stable, Dean straightens out and smiles.
BBD: Left them with my very good friend, maybe you’ve heard of him? Lunchbox Larry? That’s where they are, but you don’t need to worry about them, because this little meeting isn’t about them, or him! This is about me… and you, and YOU!
Bobby points his finger towards Mushi, then towards Leon.
BBD: That’s right! I want the Foreign Legion. Episode eight, next week! You got the guts to take on the most most beautiful wrestler Classic Wrestling has ever and will ever see? Huh? Well do ya, punks?!
Eddie Dante, at first taken aback by… pretty much everything that was just said… suddenly a smile of pure evil joy slowly forms. He looks over his right shoulder at Leon, then over his left at Mushigihara before returning his focus on the rotund wrestler in front of him.
Dante: Deal. I’ll make sure it happens right away… champ.
Bobby sighs in relief while wiping his forehead from the beads of sweat. A triumph smile on his face, he casually leans against the door jam as if the threat has now disappeared.
BBD: YES! Man, that was waaaaay easier than I thought it’d be. So, which one of you beasts wants to step in the ring with the Beauty?
Before either of the two members of Foreign Legion can answer, their manager slowly shakes his head and pointer finger simultaneously.
Dante: No, no, no, Mr. Dean. You need to learn, you must be more careful in what you ask for! You see, you said you wanted Foreign Legion. And the Foreign Legion is what you’ll get! Episode eight, Bobby Dean versus Leon Van Zant AND Mushigihara… in a 2-on-1 handicap match!
Bob’s relieved smile disappears in a flash as he immediately pushes himself off the door jamb. His eyes nearly pop out of their sockets. His face flushes red. He starts to nod nervously as he slowly backsteps his way through the door he barged into.
BBD: Yeah… good… that’s good… that’s exactly what I meant, anyway… I gotta go now. Larry’s probably worried, ya know? And those donuts… they won’t just eat themselves. Heh…
Dean bolts as soon as he’s out the door and the scene fades at the sight of Eddie Dante’s sinister smile and Foreign Legion cracking their knuckles while nodding their heads.