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Mikey Unlikey's Fed of All Feds

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Coming Soon

July 18, 2022 by mikey

Your Classic Wrestling broadcast is suddenly interrupted by an aerial shot of a palatial mansion built halfway hanging over a cliff in the west Hollywood hills. We spend several moments looking at this mansion as the shot carefully rotates along the great balcony that is the full length of the mansion. Our shot changes once again so that we are now on that great sprawling balcony. A large “in ground” pool is in the distance with its own grotto, nearby is a large hot tub, big enough for at least a dozen people. A little closer is a fully stocked outdoor kitchen and bar and that is where we see the newest addition to the Classic Wrestling roster. Dressed to the nines in the fanciest white suit money can buy is “The Moneymaker” Almir Sayed. Almir leans against the bar with a freshly made dry martini in his hand, beside him is his closest confidant and manager, Haseem.

Haseem: Good evening ladies and gentlemen of Classic Wrestling. My name is Haseem. And it is my honor to introduce to you the future of Classic Wrestling. Beside me is a man who should need no introduction. He has been dominating the professional wrestling world ever since the first time he laced up a pair of boots. But I will introduce him anyway. He is THE MONEYMAKER! HE IS! ALMIR SAYED!

Almir smirks as he takes a sip from his drink before placing it back down. He turns to look at the camera, lowering his Oakley FlakJacket 2.0’s in the process.

Almir Sayed: So this is the Classic Wrestling I have heard so much about?

Almir looks around to acknowledge he is nowhere near the show this week.

Almir Sayed: Well, obviously not this. I wouldn’t be caught dead in whatever podunk town Classic Wrestling has gone to this week. No. When I make my official debut inside their professional wrestling ring it will be in front of fans who deserve to bask in my glory.

Haseem claps at the proclamation.

Almir Sayed: In the meantime let me leave you with this. I did not sign with Classic Wrestling to make friends. I did not come here to be cheered. I signed my name to a very lucrative deal, one I’m sure their top stars would be jealous of, to make even more money than I already have. We all know whoever holds the gold gets the largest cut of the pie. I do not like to share. I am here to make money! I am here to win championships! And that is exactly what I am going to do.

Almir takes his glass and drinks the last of his martini. Haseem steps forward as Almir leaves the shot.

Haseem: We will be seeing you live and in person very soon!

The shot ends with the snarling face of Haseem as you are returned to the studio from which Classic Wrestling emanates this week.

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